Teaching a Bad Dog New Tricks


As a work-obsessed bachelor, Chicago lawyer David Buetow feared his life was empty. So he got a dog named Duncan. Now, Buetow believes that Duncan helped him grow into a better, more mature person.


From NPR news, this is weekend edition, I am Liane Hansen.

I believe in mystery.
I believe in family.
I believe in being who I am.
I believe in the power of failure.
And I believe normal life is extraordinary.
This I Believe.

Today's This I Believe essay was sent to us by Chicago attorney David Buetow. He was a lifelong bachelor. Then a couple of years ago, Buetow got a dog. An explanation is in order. Here is our series curator, independent producer, Jay Allison.

David Buetow wrote his This I Believe essay as a valentine to his chocolate Labrador retriever Duncan. After becoming a dog owner, Buetow realized that having Duncan had changed his approach to life, and even changed his beliefs. Here is David Buetow with his essay for This I Believe.

I believe in my dog. I believe in the way he lives his life and I try to emulate him. I strive to gain his level of happiness in the simplest things. Like the way he approaches each meal with endless appreciation and even joy. While I struggle to decide what to eat from full cupboards and lament what I don't have. He circles the floor excitedly anticipating the very same meal in the very same portion at the very same time everyday.

I believe in how he lives in the present. As my day feels with stress, crowded commutes and endless deadlines. I think of Duncan home alone. His day was probably boring. But he is ready to move right past it once we were together. I believe in his egalitarian treatment of everyone despite race, creed or appearance. He never prejudges. Before I had him, I considered myself street smart, avoiding eye contact with people I didn't know, or didn't think I wanted to know. Running through Chicago neighborhoods with Duncan has changed all that. Now each time people smile at us, I smile back. And if Duncan stops to say hello, I stop and greet them too. I never had a dog before. I got Duncan at the urging of a friend who had probably grown as tired as my bachelor behavior as I had. My long work nights and weekends always ended with the lonely run, a bourbon or two, or a phone call to someone I don't really listened to. All I talked about was me and what was wrong with my life. My friends stopped asking me out because I was either at work or talking about work. I had dates with women who would mistakenly think I was loyal to them but I never returned their calls or thanked them for the cookies they left on my doorstep.

I was what some people would call "a dog"--a bad dog. Not one person depended on me nor I upon them. One Sunday I woke up at noon, and I suddenly noticed how silent my house was and my life was. I realized I couldn't expect any valuable relationship until I created one first. So I got Duncan.

All of a sudden, where no one depended on me, he did. It was extreme detox from selfishness. Let me out, feed me, clean up after me, watch me sleep. I found that I actually like being relied upon. When I realized that I can meet his needs, I also realized he met mine. I believe in the nobility of Duncan's loyalty and his enthusiasm. Every time I come in the door, he is waiting to greet me with glee. Now, when my girlfriend comes over, I get up and runs to the door to greet her like I learned to do from my dog.

David Buetow with his essay for This I Believe. Buetow recently gave us the news that his girlfriend is now his fiancee. And as you now understand he credits Duncan with that transition. We hope you'll consider our invitation to write about the beliefs that guide you life at npr.org/thisibelieve. You can find information about submitting your essay and see all the essays from the past two and a half years. For This I Believe, I am Jay Allison.

Jay Allison is co-editor with Dan Gediman of the book This I Believe, the personal philosophies of remarkable men and women. You can hear the next This I Believe essay a week from tomorrow on All Things Considered. Washington lawyer, Yolanda Yang shares her thoughts on forgiveness, a quality she's had to practice frequently with her father.

Support for This I Believe comes from Prudential Retirement.