[00:00.52]13.The Best Kind of Love

[00:04.21]I have a friend who is falling in love.

[00:07.26]She honestly claims the sky is bluer.

[00:10.75]Mozart moves her to tears.

[00:13.26]She has lost 15 pounds and looks like a cover girl.

[00:17.17]“I’m young again!” she shouts excitedly.

[00:20.66]As my friend raves on about her new love, I’ve taken a good look at my old one.

[00:26.10]My husband of almost 20 years, Scott, has gained 15 pounds.

[00:31.22]Once a marathon runner, he now runs only down hospital halls.

[00:36.12]When my friend asked me “What will make this love last?”

[00:40.47]I ran through all the obvious reasons: commitment, shared interests, unselfishness, physical attraction, communication.

[00:50.17]Yet there’s more.

[00:52.78]And there are surprises.

[00:55.50]One time I came home to find a note on the front door that led me to another note, then another, until I reached the walk-in closet.

[01:03.56]I opened the door to find Scott holding a “pot of gold” (my cooking kettle) and the “treasure” of a gift package.

[01:12.17]There is understanding. I understand why he must play basketball with the guys.

[01:17.72]And he understands why, once a year, I must get away from the house,

[01:22.84]the kids — and even him — to meet my sisters for a few days of nonstop talking and laughing.

[01:29.37]There is sharing. Not only do we share household worries and parental burdens — we also share ideas.

[01:37.86]Scott came home from a convention last month and presented me with a thick historical novel.

[01:43.75]Though he prefers thrillers and science fiction, he had read the novel on the plane.

[01:49.41]He touched my heart when he explained it was because he wanted to be able to exchange ideas about the book after I’d read it.

[01:56.92]There is forgiveness. When I’m embarrassingly loud and crazy at parties, Scott forgives me.

[02:04.43]When he confessed losing some of our savings in the stock market,

[02:09.11]I gave him a hug and said, “It’s okay. It’s only money.”

[02:13.14]Finally, there is knowing.

[02:15.87]I know Scott will throw his laundry just shy of the hamper every night;

[02:20.22]he’ll be late to most appointments.

[02:22.51]He knows that I sleep with a pillow over my head;

[02:25.99]I’ll lock us out of the house on a regular basis.

[02:30.03]I guess our love lasts because it is comfortable.

[02:34.27]No, the sky is not bluer: it’s just a familiar hue.

[02:38.30]We don’t feel particularly young: we’ve experienced too much that has contributed to our growth and wisdom,

[02:45.30]taking its toll on our bodies, and created our memories.

[02:48.91]As a bride, I had Scott’s wedding band engraved with Robert Browning’s line “Grow old along with me!”

[02:56.13]We’re following those instructions.

[02:58.87]“If anything is real, the heart will make it plain.”