[00:00.30]6.Happy Holidays

[00:05.52]In prison, holidays is the worst.

[00:08.14]Birthdays, anniversaries, Thanksgiving, Christmas, even Valentine’s Day can be a “bummer.”

[00:15.11]It’s difficult and painful to be away from those we love — to be left out of the celebrations and the memory making.

[00:22.29]Many times, we feel a little forgotten or overlooked.

[00:26.61]Birthdays in prison come and go without the comfort of cake with candles and the magic of blowing them out.

[00:32.70]Christmas mornings are without a fancy tree or presents.

[00:36.19]Thanksgivings are hard to feel thankful for, with dinner served on a cold, metal cafeteria tray.

[00:42.61]My first Thanksgiving in prison, I refused to eat.

[00:46.42]My first birthday I spent alternating between rage and feeling more sorry for myself than ever before.

[00:53.06]On Christmas, I wouldn’t even get out of bed.

[00:56.12]I stayed under the covers to hide the tears I cried all day.

[01:00.47]So holidays in here are the worst — at least I thought they were until I realized a few things.

[01:07.00]Once I stripped away all the commercialism and hype, I saw what holidays were all about.

[01:13.21]They’re elaborate excuses we use to take a look at our lives, our successes and failures,

[01:19.09]and to spend quality time with our loved ones.

[01:22.25]In here or out there, we can still take stock of ourselves and make plans, dream dreams,

[01:28.67]examine our behavior to see what we like and don’t like.

[01:32.49]Even in here, we have the power to change what falls short of our ideal self-image.

[01:37.71]Not being able to spend quality time with those we love is a little tougher

[01:42.61]—until we realize that the people we care for are always with us.

[01:46.97]And just as they’re with us, we are with them in spirit.

[01:50.89]The days we can’t spend together physically, we can still take time to remember them fondly…

[01:56.99]making phone calls, sending cards or letters helps ourselves and our loved ones.

[02:02.65]Other people don’t make us happy.

[02:04.94]Special places and people might help the mood, but the celebration and love comes from within.

[02:11.68]The challenge is to find it there — a state of mind, a positive attitude.

[02:16.82]It’s easy to use a holiday as an excuse to be sad or edgy.

[02:20.98]I’ve been there. Our challenge is to celebrate every day as special.

[02:26.23]Life is a precious gift, whether we’re in jail or not.

[02:29.95]I’m planning a celebration every day this year — a celebration of life.

[02:35.09]You’re invited. Happy Holidays!