A New Beginning

I placed the small bottle labeled "Club Soda"on the floor,in front of the shrink.

"What's this?"She asked.

"This,is vodka,"I replied."Let me tell you a story about it."

"Once upon a time,a girl went to school at Fort River.She was in sixth grade,and always did everything right.When she moved on to the Middle School,nothing went right.She made a few friends,but lost even more.The teachers didn't like her,and the best part of school was the bus ride home.

"She never got offered drugs or alcohol.She never thought of trying a way out,instead,she just put up with the remarks,the teasing,the names,the teachers,and the hate.

"When her mom realized what was happening at the Middle School,she was allowed to apply for a private school,MacDuffie.She did amazingly well on the SATs,and got in."

I paused for breath.Taking a deep breath,I prepared for the next part of the story.

"What the girl's mother didn't know,was that her new friends would drink and do drugs.The girl wanted to try drinking,but not by herself.She was too scared.She brought in a couple of cans of her dad's beer,and her friend and her drank them during lunch.They hid around the corner,almost off school grounds.No one saw them.

"She felt a little lightheaded,and couldn't concentrate that well,but felt a lot better about her life.She wasn't bothered by things anymore,so when she got home,she decided to try other liquors.She experimented with her dad's stuff,and found that straight vodka got you drunk in no time.It was strong,and her dad had so much of it,that he couldn't miss a little.

"She liked the vodka burning her throat.She could concentrate on that until the drunk sensation set in ."I paused again.Another few deep breaths,and my eyes closed.

"She dumped her boyfriend.He was bugging her,and she didn't like him around anymore and threatened to report his harassment to the police.She thought that she would be better off alone.Instead of feeling better,she fell into depression.She told her friend that the next time she got some weed,she wanted to try it."Her friend got a dealer.When she went to her friend's house,they called him,but her parents were too cautious.They couldn't meet him.She never got a chance to smoke.

"Before all this happened,she was online a lot.Talking to people from around the world,always learning.She talked to her friend in Chicago a lot.Her friend had moved there a while ago.When they were talking one day,the girl in Chicago gave her the screen name of a male friend of hers.

"This guy was so wonderful.She couldn't resist his glamour.She would talk to him whenever she got the time.They got closer and closer,and when the girl dumped her boyfriend,this guy told her that he loved her.By that time,she loved him too.More than words could express,they were perfect for each other.

"Now,they talked every night.They would both be online by ten,and would sometimes stay up until one in the morning talking."When she started thinking about cocaine,she didn't tell him.It was a last,desperate escape,only to be used when she couldn't talk to him.Her ex-boyfriend told her it was a bad idea.Told her she shouldn't.That only made her more determined,just to show him.

"Two days after her friends and her talked to the drug dealer,she was online,and the guy asked her a very important question.A question that she couldn't answer right then.She told him she didn't want to pressure herself into giving a rash answer that night.

"She was so happy,that tears were running down her face.She couldn't see the keyboard,almost.Even after the guy had to get off,she stayed up,and made a list of New Year's Resolutions.The first two,were that she would never do drugs,and that she would try her hardest to stop drinking.She didn't want to mess up her life,when it was just starting.

"It was a list of little thing she could do,that would help life a lot.Every one she wrote down was something she could keep."I looked up at the shrink,sitting in her chair."That bottle was full a little over a month ago.The vodka is proof."

The shrink looked at how low the level was.I closed my eyes again,and started weeping silently.

"The girl in that story was me."

New Year's Resolutions.I will mend my ways.I will rectify my mistakes. I swore an oath not to do drugs henceforth.I will try my hardest to stop drinking.I'll cut down on my allowance. I will do my quota of housework and my own laundry.II will learn to conserve water.I will do all my homework every night.I will join the school's upcoming torch relay. I will still be a friend to my ex-boyfriend.I will be frank about my feelings with him.I will read novels and recite portry for spiritual fulfillment.I will use the stationary bicycle 15-min a day.I will try to get along well with my brother and not to be hostile to him any longer.I will go to church every Sunday.I will make conscientious efforts to succeed in school.I will practice piano for a minimum of three times a week. I will e-mail my grandparents once a week.I will call my best friend once a week.I will browse through the news.

In one word,I will get a new leaf on life.

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